Tokyo Mirage Sessions #FE Review
A
Journalistic Review by DefiantParrot
*Warning: Contains Spoilers*
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| Like two anime did the fusion dance |
Originally Written: 07/01/2018
Developer: Atlus
Publisher: Nintendo
Platform: Nintendo Wii U
Genre: Japanese Role-Playing Game
Release: June 24, 2016
Fucking
Anime.
I know what you’re thinking, Parrot why did you choose to
play two JRPG’s so close together? Or maybe why are you reviewing a game for
the Wii U? Nintendo’s worse system since the Virtual Boy?
Well because I said when I started this there is no game
I will not review, no system I will not play in order to give my thoughts on it
and maybe make a few jokes along the way.
And who knows maybe I’ll like this one, so here is my
review of Tokyo Mirage Sessions #FE my god I hate this title.
So there are a few things to note real quick about this
game.
1.
This game is a bit of a combination of two
franchises, the Shin Megami Tensei/Persona series which I have never played and
Fire Emblem a series that I have played and enjoyed.
2.
I’ve heard people talk about the localization
from this game, bringing it from Japan to America and while I’m sure
fascinating to some I really don’t care for this game. I’m not going to be
comparing it step by step with it’s Japanese release I’m looking at what I have
played.
3.
And this is most important I HATE the goddamn
title of this game!
Look I know it makes sense it context let’s break it
down.
Tokyo: The game is set in Tokyo, fair enough
Mirage: Are the names of the monsters you fight in this
game. Cool.
Sessions: Sessions are chain attacks you can perform with
your allies. Neat.
# - No fucking clue, what is this Sharp? Hashtag? Phone
Number? Got nothing here
FE – Fire Emblem I assume, probably having to remind you
that Fire Emblem is even a part of this game since it’s 85% SMT and like 15%
Fire Emblem
Okay so bitching about the title out of the way let’s get
into the actual game here
This game is very Japan and Anime and I mean VERY Japan
and Anime, which I’ll state is not a bad thing in of itself, but if you’re not
REALLY into this sort of thing, you’re not gonna have much fun.
The first thing you’ll notice in this game is that it
looks FANTASTIC! The art style and fully animated cutscenes (when they happen)
are beautiful. The opening cutscene of a young child watching the people around
her disappear (including her sister) sets the stage to let you know something.
This game is going to look great and it does.
This game has style and I can’t take that away from it
and it isn’t just the graphics, when out and about in the world of Tokyo the
people in the background are different colors, indicating ones you can or
cannot talk to. This game is colorful and is a breath of fresh air in that
regard no doubt.
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| Sweet, sweet fan service |
So after the cutscene you take control of Itsuki Aoi
bland anime character #14 and he notices an old friend of his, Tsubasa waiting
to try out to… be an idol, sing? Something like that sorry I was distracted
because of Tsubasa’s massive chest. Jesus Christ! Lara Croft eat your heart
out, yeah this is Japan alright.
Anyway the interviewer talking to Tsubasa begins getting
creepy as hell, and suddenly reveals himself to be a Mirage! Monsters in this
world who feed on Performa… Which is a substance inside of talented people such
as singers and actors… I think? It’s not really explained what the hell this
stuff is.
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| Rape Face #2 |
Anyway he kidnaps Tsubasa and takes her into an
Idolasphere, a gateway between his world and ours and our brave hero Itsuki
shrugs it off and goes home… Nah just kidding he chases after the monster to
save his friend.
Inside the Idolasphere is when Ituski and Tsubasa meet…
their Mirages I guess? Mirages they can control, making them Mirage Masters.
I’m sorry I know I’m not doing a good job describing what’s going on here, but
frankly I could barely follow.
Anyway Ituski and Tsubasa realize they have mirage allies
in Chrom and Caeda characters from Fire Emblem.
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| Had a rough night buddy? |
After another friend of theirs Touma and his Mirage Cain
show up they defeat the creepy mirage guy and prove themselves worthy to join
Touma and other Mirage Masters.
Which involves joining the Fortuna agency and becoming
idols… and fighting monsters too, there they meet several other characters and
Mirage Masters.
Such as Tiki a Mirage whose job it is to be cute, and
help upgrade weapons and such until the plot deems her important.
Maiko the fan service leader of Fortuna
Barry the trainer who is extremely unlikeable and creepy
due to his affections for a young girl… Yeah yeah translation problem or
something sure, but this guy made me uneasy throughout the game.
So yeah a bit odd admittedly but not too different from
most plots, character finds out they’re special find a group of other special
people, helps fight evil.
One of my biggest problems with this plot is that it
takes a long time for it to go anywhere, we’re told early on that there’s
probably someone leading the Mirages and purposefully looking to steal all the
performa they can. But that doesn’t go anywhere until Chapter 5, only a few
hours away from the end.
Until that point the game consists of the same thing.
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| Still Fucking Pretty!!! |
Characters live their lives, Tsubasa says or does
something stupid, person from Fortuna has a new job in entertainment, Mirages
show up and fuck everything up, we up chase them into the Idolasphere, shitty dungeon,
boss fight rinse and repeat.
No story progression until ¾ of the way through the game.
And yeah they use that time to try and establish the characters but that
doesn’t really work there’s only a handful of these characters I like, and only
a few of the new party members are interesting.
Itsuki is a block of wood, just the stereotypical anime
protagonist, nice and brave and every female character wants to use his face as
a bicycle seat.
I really didn’t care about Tsubasa. You could argue that
this game is really about her as she was the child in the opening cutscene and
you do see her growth throughout the game, going from fangirl to idol. But she
never really changes, she’s always stupid, always doubts herself, always saying
something dumb that a fangirl would and I’m sorry the massive heaving breasts
are just fucking stupid.
Touma isn’t nearly as bad, he wants to be a hero… and
that’s about it. Next!
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| I Love You!!!! *Ahem* forgive me |
Kiria is the next party member an already established
idol, her story is basically hey, it’s okay to be girly… That’s it, but she’s
cool and knowledgeable and useful in a fight. She can stay.
Next is Ellie she wants to go to Hollywood and that’s
pretty much all she talks about, oh that and being biracial. Now she annoyed me
up until her side quests, you see a softer side to her character and I thought
they were going to take her character in a new direction… and then they don’t.
Next is Mamori the youngest of the team who is fine, but
is the child that Barry is all obsessed over. Which means I was constantly
uncomfortable when these two were in the same room together, don’t you touch
her you sick fuck!
And finally Yashiro the best character in the game.
Although Sasuke called he wants his brooding back.
Every single one of these party members have three side
quests a piece. And while for many of these they’re not difficult to complete
at all. They are totally worthwhile.
And that leads me to the combat of Tokyo Mirage Sessions
Hashtag Fuck Everything.
It is the typical turn based JRPG combat system with a
couple variations, one is the carnage or weapons that Tiki can make for you,
gaining new abilities the more you use new weapons and the titular sessions of
course.
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| No Context |
As stated earlier these are chain attacks, for instance
if Itsuki hits an enemy with one of his special abilities, another ally can then
launch into an attack of their own, by end game you can chain together attacks from
the entire party whether they’re currently on the field or not.
There’s many other variations to these too such as Ad-Lib
performances which are special attacks characters may randomly pull off in
battle, you unlock many of these from the party member side quests I mentioned
earlier.
Then there are other performances where two characters
can perform a Session together sometimes, dealing major damage to the enemy or
healing the entire party and all of these can lead into more sessions.
The point of this is to make every battle feel like a
performance which is kinda cool admittedly it can be flashy and dazzling and
satisfying as hell.
Between each chapter are Intermissions, where the plot
will not continue until you will it too. Here is a great way to complete
character side quests or anything else you wish to complete without having to
worry about the story.
As a game so dedicated to showing off how awesome and
flashy it is to be an idol, the music had to be on point. And boy did they
knock that out of the park. The music in this game is really good particularly
when the game goes full animation and characters perform sometimes full songs.
It can be beautiful and toe tapping. Now if only anyone here spoke English.
No English voice acting whatsoever, all Japanese spoken
with English subtitles. Which I can get over, but I prefer hearing over reading
very fast.
Though not understanding Japanese doesn’t completely take
away from that music mind you.
I mentioned I didn’t like the dungeons earlier, and I
really don’t. I know some do enjoy these and I can’t think of anything they did
specifically wrong here. I just HATE them, they’re like big puzzles and I hate
a puzzle standing between me and something I just want to get too already with
the final dungeon especially trying my patience.
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| Hello Not-Marth |
I did feel the need to grind here, revisiting other
dungeons or spending some time in the colosseum leveling up so that I can get
past a challenge and continue on with the game, just something to point out.
The final boss is also pretty cool, I won’t spoil
anything, but he’s big and pissed. Wish there were checkpoints during his fight
though is all I’m saying.
So yeah, this review is probably a little more disjointed
than my others, I’m sorry about that. This game is just all over the place for
me, what it does right I really enjoy. The combat, visuals and music for
instance. But I hate the story telling, I hate the dungeons exploring which
again is just me on this, but this is my review.
So all in all I am going to give Tokyo Mirage Sessions….
And I’ve thought hard about this. A high…
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| For when you're not Persona |
Bronze Seal of Acceptance.
Now I can hear JRPG fans in the comments calling me a
Feathery Fuckhead and hoping I get murdered by a hungry spider. But that
doesn’t change how I felt about this one.
Comparatively Ni no Kuni was a JRPG I felt anyone could
enjoy.
Tokyo Mirage Sessions is a game I think JRPG fans and
Anime fans will really enjoy. The rest of us though, not so much.
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